The ‘Affectionator’ Machine Lets Your Dog Pet You

People with pets love to say that really, their animals own them, not the other way around.
But this contraption, which allows dogs to “pet” their humans and give them treats, really drives that sentiment home.

The video went up on …

People with pets love to say that really, their animals own them, not the other way around.

But this contraption, which allows dogs to “pet” their humans and give them treats, really drives that sentiment home.

The video went up on YouTube in May, but it’s been popping up all over online this week.

While it might seem sort of silly to employ a robot to pet your dog when you’re sitting right across the table, hooking something like this up remotely — say, when you’re at work, could be pretty awesome.

And if your dog could pet you or give you treats (maybe coffee?) while you’re at the office, well… we can only dream.

H/T Makezine

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The Conversation

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Joe and I had his 6-year-old daughter Kristen with us as we made the 3-hour night drive up to his house in the mountains. It had been silent in the car for quite some time and we assumed that she was sleeping soundly.

Suddenly a little voice piped up from the back seat.
“You know,” said Kristen, “some women get their vaginas pierced.” She pronounced the word vagina with relish.

I tried to stifle my shock and replied “But that’s very unusual,” in a feeble attempt to reassure her that she didn’t need to worry about this for her future, hoping to spare her an early childhood trauma.

“Yes but some women do get their vaginas pierced.” 

“Yes, but it’s very unusual,” I repeated weakly.

She was like a dog with a bone, repeating it like a mantra she had latched onto. “But some women do get their vaginas pierced!” 

At this point, Joe whirled his head around and said emphatically, “But you’re never going to do that!”

Kristen solemnly replied, “I’ll try not to, Daddy.” 

This is the conversation that took place, verbatim. The names have been changed to protect the precocious.

This first appeared in “The Coffeelicious” on Medium.com

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

2016-06-22-1466558276-973242-girl811582.jpg

Joe and I had his 6-year-old daughter Kristen with us as we made the 3-hour night drive up to his house in the mountains. It had been silent in the car for quite some time and we assumed that she was sleeping soundly.

Suddenly a little voice piped up from the back seat.
“You know,” said Kristen, “some women get their vaginas pierced.” She pronounced the word vagina with relish.

I tried to stifle my shock and replied “But that’s very unusual,” in a feeble attempt to reassure her that she didn’t need to worry about this for her future, hoping to spare her an early childhood trauma.

“Yes but some women do get their vaginas pierced.” 

“Yes, but it’s very unusual,” I repeated weakly.

She was like a dog with a bone, repeating it like a mantra she had latched onto. “But some women do get their vaginas pierced!” 

At this point, Joe whirled his head around and said emphatically, “But you’re never going to do that!”

Kristen solemnly replied, “I’ll try not to, Daddy.” 

This is the conversation that took place, verbatim. The names have been changed to protect the precocious.

This first appeared in “The Coffeelicious” on Medium.com

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Sperm Count: Naked in Toledo

A lot of people are just bored and can find nothing more thrilling to do than pull down their pants There’s a thrill to watching porn when you’re in a listless mood, but it’s even more exciting to make it and anyone can do it. Those who are exhibition…

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A lot of people are just bored and can find nothing more thrilling to do than pull down their pants There’s a thrill to watching porn when you’re in a listless mood, but it’s even more exciting to make it and anyone can do it. Those who are exhibitionistically inclined need no longer confine their activities to undressing in front of their dorm or bedroom windows. All you need is the capacity to record yourself and you’re off to one of those sites where you’ll have your moment of fame. Imagine that you’re just sitting listlessly in the one room you rent in Toledo, with the peeling paint on the wall, the kind of apartment that David Lynch might have used in one of his movies.There’s nothing but the local Irish bar with the red faced guys sitting cross legged on stools with their veiny bulbous noses, the kinds of barflies who have nothing better to do than to look indignant as you walk in to drink by yourself. But now just unzip your fly or let that skirt drop to the floor, click your heels three times chanting “there is no place worse than this prison”and you’re on your way to a new life in which you can freely show your body to like minded individuals. A lot of people feel daunted when they think of the giants of adult cinema like Ron Jeremy, John Holmes, Sasha Grey or La Cicciolina, but you have to start somewhere and there’s no better place than in front of your own Airbook. Who knows how many people will eventually see your dick or pussy? We live in a new D.I.Y. universe where everyone has their 15 minutes of fame. You no longer have to be Steven Spielberg to run a studio. Twitter, Facebook have created promotional opportunities for everyone. Put one foot in front of the other and take it a day at a time and before you know it, you’ll have more “friends” than you know what to do with and you’ll never be bored.

{This was originally posted to The Screaming Pope, Francis Levy’s blog of rants and reactions to contemporary politics, art and culture}

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Proposed “Spot The Conspiracy Theory” Test for 2016 Voter Eligibility Threatens to Disqualify Trump, Sanders Supporters

The U.S. Election Assistance Commission is said to be considering a proposal that would require voters to pass a simple test of their ability to distinguish conspiratorial fiction from fact-based historical data when choosing a candidate. According to…

The U.S. Election Assistance Commission is said to be considering a proposal that would require voters to pass a simple test of their ability to distinguish conspiratorial fiction from fact-based historical data when choosing a candidate. According to political experts, such a test, which would reduce the Sanders movement by as much as two-thirds while completely wiping out the Trump vote, would by default assure Hillary Clinton of the most lopsided presidential election win in history this November.

Sources inside the RNC call the proposed test grossly unfair, comparing it with earlier attempts by their own party to restrict the voting rights of developmentally disabled citizens, but the group responsible for the test insists that the questions are not I.Q sensitive and are specifically designed to disqualify only the willfully ignorant.

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Trump Gifts For Your Friends Struggling To Cope With His Campaign

Make no mistake: Donald Trump regularly incites political violence and is a serial liar, rampant xenophobe, racist, misogynist and birther. 
But give the man credit: He is (unintentionally) making Ameri…

Make no mistake: Donald Trump regularly incites political violence and is a serial liarrampant xenophoberacistmisogynist and birther. 

But give the man credit: He is (unintentionally) making American political memorabilia great again.

There are Trump wigs, Trump masks, and, appropriately, Trump dog poop bags. You can get Trump socks that, unlike the candidate, have realistic hair. There are even Trump bobblehead dolls that express his racism in two different ways.

Regardless of your personal preferences, this stuff is all classier than a “Make America Great Again” baseball cap.

Editor’s note: Donald Trump regularly incites political violence and is a serial liar,rampant xenophoberacistmisogynist and birther who has repeatedly pledged to ban all Muslims — 1.6 billion members of an entire religion — from entering the U.S. 

Also on HuffPost:

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

My Bucket List

1) A big bucket
2) A medium-sized bucket
3) A really little bucket
4) A Mr. Bucket children’s game
5) A bucket from The Bozo Show Grand Prize Game
6) A bucket a person could fit in
7) A bucket a baby could fit in
8) A bucket for making sand castles
9) …

1) A big bucket
2) A medium-sized bucket
3) A really little bucket
4) A Mr. Bucket children’s game
5) A bucket from The Bozo Show Grand Prize Game
6) A bucket a person could fit in
7) A bucket a baby could fit in
8) A bucket for making sand castles
9) A red bucket
10) A blue bucket
11) A red and blue bucket
12) A brand new bucket
13) A bucket that has seen some stuff
14) A bucket with a handle
15) A bucket without a handle
16) A bucket with a hole in it, Dear Liza
17) A vintage fireman’s bucket
18) A bucket in a bucket
19) A bucket that’s really a cup

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Bill Maher Says ‘Pride And Prejudice’ Won Out In UK’s Brexit Vote

Bill Maher turned to Jane Austen to explain the United Kingdom’s decision to leave the European Union.
The “Real Time with Bill Maher” host referenced two of the 18th century British writer’s novels on Friday, as he broke down Britain’s surprise vote t…

Bill Maher turned to Jane Austen to explain the United Kingdom’s decision to leave the European Union.

The “Real Time with Bill Maher” host referenced two of the 18th century British writer’s novels on Friday, as he broke down Britain’s surprise vote to exit the EU, known as Brexit.

“Forty-eight percent voted for Sense and Sensibility,” he said. “And 52 percent voted for Pride and Prejudice.”

The comedian said the issue of whether the U.K. should stay inside the European Union had been “hijacked by a bunch of anti-immigration isolationists who are obsessed with the idea that foreigners were stealing their jobs.”

“Thank God something like that never happened here,” he sarcastically added, in a clear nod toward Donald Trump.

Maher further mocked the presumptive GOP presidential candidate for being in favor of a Brexit.

“Economists all over the world are saying this is a catastrophically stupid move, as evidence they offered lots of data, lots of charts, and the fact that Trump is for it,” he said.

Watch the full clip above.

 

Editor’s note: Donald Trump regularly incites political violence and is a serial liarrampant xenophoberacistmisogynist and birther who has repeatedly pledged to ban all Muslims — 1.6 billion members of an entire religion — from entering the U.S.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Bill Maher: Donald Trump’s Campaign Is ‘America’s Inner Asshole’

Bill Maher says Donald Trump’s presidential campaign is the “last dying gasp of the old America.”
The “Real Time with Bill Maher” host said on Friday that the U.S. has “come a long way” since President Barack Obama took office in 2009…

Bill Maher says Donald Trump’s presidential campaign is the “last dying gasp of the old America.”

The “Real Time with Bill Maher” host said on Friday that the U.S. has “come a long way” since President Barack Obama took office in 2009.

Trump’s a throwback to the old days, Maher said. “America’s inner asshole. The macho screaming man baby, but we’re not that guy any more.”

So the comedian urged Obama to spend his last six months going on a “world apology tour” to make amends for all the harm America has intentionally and unintentionally done to other countries over the years.

Why? Firstly, “it will drive Republicans nuts,” Maher said.

“And more importantly, to a world that has been trembling over the prospect of us electing Donald Trump, it would be a great way to send a message: ‘America, we’re back on our meds,'” he added.

Watch the full clip above.

Editor’s note: Donald Trump regularly incites political violence and is a serial liarrampant xenophoberacistmisogynist and birther who has repeatedly pledged to ban all Muslims — 1.6 billion members of an entire religion — from entering the U.S.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.