Ahhhh, Mothers-can’t live with them and you can’t live without them…literally. It’s that time of year again, where we’re reminded (mostly by moms) that every day should be Mother’s Day.
Whether or not your mother is still living or not, one thing is true-she risked her life bringing you into this world. Maybe that’s the reason that moms are the only ones reserved the right to say “I brought you into this world, and I can take you out!” Anyone who’s heard that one, raise your hand-but don’t speak until spoken to! Never mind all those times you were naughty-momma always knew what would help you fall back in line:
'Life is like a box of chocolates, better get me something for #MothersDay because I brought you into this world & I can take you out' -Mom
— The Refined Ruffian (@CulturedRuffian) May 9, 2015
10: Can we go to the adoption store and pick up a new baby?
Me: Sweet girl, Mama has 4 kids. If we go right now it's probably to drop off.
— ʝo̥ Ðιg̥gιтy (@WhaJoTalkinBout) March 30, 2016
I've never been #BackToTheFuture , but my mom always used to promise me she'd knock me into next week if I didn't behave.
— The Refined Ruffian (@CulturedRuffian) October 21, 2015
Kids… kids… KIDS!!!!
TURN THAT TV DOWN! I CAN BARELY HEAR YOUR MOM SLAM DISHES AROUND!!!
— Bob Heller (@Bob_Heller) March 1, 2015
I was one of those rowdy obnoxious kids. My poor mother. Sometimes threats are the only thing that’ll work on a kid that probably needed Ritalin before Ritalin was a thing. Of course back then, I’m sure all the Kool Aid, Pop Tarts and pancakes for breakfast didn’t help matters at all. Back then, a ‘Time-Out’ was something a coach called in a sports game and a good old-fashioned spanking usually was the cure for ADD. Now a days, we have punishment via separation from electronic devices and ‘positive reinforcement’ to cure misbehavior. It’s a wonder our sweet mother’s didn’t have to carry two purses-one for the usual and one for the wine and Xanax. I have two sisters and a brother. I was a pyromaniac. At any point in time, the house could’ve burned down because of what I’d light on fire in and around the perimeter. My brother Adam was like the Tasmanian Devil. It’s a wonder he didn’t tear down the house. My sisters Amy and Stacey could cat-fight with the best of them. Most moms would’ve needed a taser gun. My mom just needed her voice and ‘the look’ mostly would do the trick.
'No you can't have cake for breakfast, but I made you some healthy fried dough that I put butter and syrup on for you.' -Moms
— The Refined Ruffian (@CulturedRuffian) October 22, 2014
Mom worked in a yarn factory but still woke up early enough to make us breakfast. pic.twitter.com/nKHt4f620W
— Awescar (@awescar) April 14, 2016
It's like I'm the only mom at this softball game with wine stained lips.
— Ashley (@ashmensch) April 15, 2016
So we grew up a little and got all embarrassed of our moms for some reason. No more kisses on the lips, asking to be dropped off on the side of the road miles away from school, and the general shame of being seen in public with our moms. As teenagers, we were simply just too cool for our moms. They didn’t know the right things to say, have the latest haircuts, and certainly they knew nothing of fashion like layering clothing or pegging guy’s pants.
My mom's favorite part of my birthday is describing my birth in detail to an 18 year old waitress who is just there to get our drink order.
— The Refined Ruffian (@CulturedRuffian) November 1, 2015
Sometimes as teenagers-you wonder whether how and if this could even be your real family. Maybe you were switched at birth, yeah that’s it-there had to be a mistake at the hospital.
My mom just told me she doesn't care for Butterfingers. I always suspected I was adopted.
— Revveler (@NotARatsAss) January 1, 2016
Every once in a while, you may have tried to slip one by mom and then you were probably reminded the woman had eyes in the back of her head and virtual omniscience and omnipresence.
"It's ok, mom will never notice it…"
~Famous last words of a teen
— Boyd's Backyard™ (@TheBoydP) August 27, 2014
As your mothers get older, they’re adapting to technology…sometimes a little slower than the rest of us. Whether it’s cell phones, Facebook, Instagram or other social media they’re learning-mostly by calling us and asking the same questions over and over again. Annoyed? Don’t be. With all the crap they put up from us, it’s really the least we could do. Sometimes, it can be annoying but if you still have your mother be thankful-a lot of people don’t and they wish they did. Just pray your mother doesn’t find out about your Twitter account…
While Facebook was down yesterday, my mom critically injured dozens while driving downtown shouting her status updates to random strangers.
— The Refined Ruffian (@CulturedRuffian) September 25, 2015
It's been over a decade, and I still don't have the heart to tell my mother it's not a cellar phone.
— Yep,they're both me. (@3sunzzz) April 20, 2016
When I want my mom to stop texting me for a couple hours, I just send her a screen shot of this: pic.twitter.com/r9WJQDiyn3
— The Refined Ruffian (@CulturedRuffian) September 3, 2015
All joking aside, please be thankful for the woman that endured pain and loved you enough to bring you into this world and whether or not it’s the same woman-love and thank the woman who raised you. They’ve sacrificed so much for us and cared for us when we were helpless. Remember to love, respect and care for them when they are helpless. Many people never had a mother figure in their life or have lost their mothers. Reach out to them, encourage them and love them. If you’re lucky enough to still have that special woman in your life, let them know how much you care and are thinking of them. Even if you don’t have the resources, reach out to them anyway. Most mothers don’t want gifts, they want your love and attention-they want you. Most of the time a call or a visit and a hug costs nothing. Life is fleeting, let your mother know you love her.
I was my mother’s first born 10lbs, 10oz. I was overweight and legally blind as a child. I was bullied often and it was always my mother who stood up for me. Later, my parents were divorced and my mother raised all four of us. Even though we had to go on welfare and food stamps, my mother worked hard to keep us together, taken care of and loved. She has endlessly and thanklessly sacrificed herself for us. She did without and suffered through so many things for a sometimes ungrateful bunch. There is nothing I could ever do enough to repay her. Momma, you’re amazing. Thank you for all you’ve done-I don’t deserve it. Happy Mother’s Day. I love you.
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