Some insider tips from your friendly political stockbroker:
ObamaYesWeCan.com. This Chicago-based firm, which thrilled investors with its innovative government reorganization software after going public in 2008, has posted disappointing earnings following sub-par performance of its Charisma Inc., subsidiary. But despite damaging disclosures about Iraq and Afghanistan investments, and lingering doubts about CEO’s management skills, analysts are betting on strong recovery in 2012.
Boehner Speakers Bureau: New over-the-counter stock soared after November 2010 launch, and steady initial performance of this solid but unexciting Ohio conglomerate seemed headed for strong future earnings. But prospect of takeover attempt by Tea Party board members and restless younger executives scares some analysts, who warn it could severely affect earnings.
Pelosi Leadership Resources Inc.: ld-line California-based corporation has few fans on Wall Street after poor performance in 2010, which analysts blame on uninspiring leadership and failure to execute ambitious marketing plan for new healthcare subsidiary. But financials remain strong and some analysts have changed recommendation from hold to buy.
Wisconsin Union Busting, Ltd.: Despite reputatation for fostering progressive business climate, new CEO is turning company in new direction with emphasis on severe cost-cutting measures. Some analysts warn he is moving too quickly but others say he could be wave of the future.
Gingrich Resurrection Consortium: Georgia firm once commanded Wall Street’s respect, but that was last century when charismatic CEO was powerful player in nation’s Capital before being undermined by internal coup attempt and government shutdown. Nevertheless, firm seems poised for possible comeback against weak competition in 2012.
Hillary & Associates: Once touted as next Apple before 2010 meltdown, global management firm is relying on new Foggy Bottom product line and CEO’s worldwide recognition to bring it back to profitability, and perhaps market domination, in coming years. But analysts are divided on whether CEO’s high profile spouse is a liability or an asset.
Issa Oversight & Demolition Inc.: California-based auto parts supplier has established foothold in Washington, D.C., market that threatens dominance of ObamaYesWeCan.com. But recent revelations of an employee’s too-close relationship with muckraking reporter may cripple firm’s core business.
China Global Ambitions Unlimited: This Asian conglomerate is riding roughshod over international trade and monetary agreements in direct challenge to Democracy, Inc. But internal pressures and authoritarian leadership could thwart its ambitious goal.
Palin’s Grizzly Moms United: This Alaska company’s spectacular debut in 2008 has failed to live up to Wall Street’s expectations since then because of CEO’s controversial actions, but company still has strong support among many investors, who are confident it will regain market share in 2012.
Bernanke Financial Advisors, Inc.: After slow start, this firm has won praise from Wall Street for helping nation avoid financial meltdown by bailing out corporate America, but jury is still out and final verdict remains uncertain.
Napolitano Security Insurance: Key player in post 9/11 era appears unable to develop effective strategy to combat terrorist threat, and has alienated investors with clumsy and invasive security procedures at nation’s airports. Latest product line “If You See Something, Say Something,” has generated little revenue.
Biden Backup Services Inc.: Closely held Delaware firm has met Wall Street’s expectations despite concerns about CEO’s reputation for lax management style, and analysts are keeping fingers crossed in hopes it can compete in bigger arena than in past 36 years.
Fox Fair & Balanced Information Services: Media conglomerate’s Glenn Beck, Bill O’Reilly and Rush Limbaugh subsidiaries still appeal to conservative investors, but analysts question whether they can compete with Wolf Blitzer, Facebook, Twitter and new HuffingtonPost-AOL behemoth.
Libya Preservation Corp.: Foreign-owned firm still controls major oil preserves, but recent widespread political unrest in region and rumors of CEO’s emotional instability and draconian management practices have caused investors to abandon stock just as they did Mubarak, Inc.
Trump Celebrity Promotions, Inc. New York tycoon’s firm has produced few useful products other than popular television show featuring celebrity wannabees, but megalomaniac CEO is confident that despite worst hair style in history, he can run for president in 2012 without being told by voters, “You’re fired.”
Sheen Trainwreck, Ltd.: Hollywood firm has been delisted from big board following bankruptcy declaration.